The One-Minute Strategy to Help You Conquer Stress
Have you ever had a day where it feels like life is just coming at you faster than you can manage? A day where you are frazzled and juggling too many things at one time?
Take for example this scenario: It's the end of a long day, you’re running late for making dinner, the kids are fighting in the other room and the pot just boiled over. You are overwhelmed! So what can you do? This, my friend, is the best time to S.T.O.P! Here is how to use this magical acronym:
S: Stop what you’re doing. You really cannot find new, effective solutions in the same mindset of stress and overwhelm. It would be like taking a subway going south, then realizing you need to go in the opposite direction and trying to jump off a moving train! First, you have to stop and get off the subway before you get too far off track. Then, you can take a moment to figure out where you really want to go.
In the scenario above, you would turn the stove down, stop cooking and let the kids be for now. Find a quiet room if you need to.Then, while taking a moment to yourself:
T: Take a breath. Breathing is key to switching your nervous system over to a more relaxed state giving you, among the many benefits, access to your higher brain centre, which is not available during stress. This allows you to be more creative and problem-solve better.
So go ahead and place your hands on your lower abdomen. Inhale deeply and slowly through your nose, allowing your abdomen to rise. Then, exhale slowly and completely, through your mouth letting your abdomen fall gently towards your spine. Do this for 4-5 breaths. As you continue breathe deeply and slowly:
O: Observe what is happening in your body, mind, and environment. Keep breathing and just notice what’s going on. How does your body feel? What emotions you are feeling? What thoughts are running through your head? And what is going on in your environment? Observe these things without judgement and without getting caught up in the story. JUST OBSERVE. And remember to keep that long, deep breathing going! By now you will be feeling calmer and have a better understanding of the situation. You are thinking more clearly and may even have a creative idea pop into your head.
In the scenario above, you might sense tension in parts of your body and your heart racing. Emotionally, you might feel overwhelmed, angry and frustrated. You may be thinking: “Why can’t the kids just behave!” “If only I didn’t have to deal with that issue at work that made me late.” “Why can’t dinner be easier?” You notice that the kids are yelling, the pot has boiled over and dinner is 30 minutes late. You may even realize that the kids are acting out because they’re hungry! Aha! And that leads to the next step:
P: Proceed. This is where you DECIDE how you want the rest of the day to go and CHOOSE how you want to proceed. You are in complete control of what happens next! This is where that higher brain centre kicks in allowing you to think more clearly and, with your ultimate goal in mind, also come up with many options. The possibilities are unlimited. Truly!
For example, in the scenario above, you decide you would like to have a more relaxed and fun evening with their family. So, now, you have a few choices about how to proceed: you could keep doing what they’re doing, you could keep cooking dinner but invite the kids over for a snack while listening to some music, or you could scratch dinner and order pizza. Because, after all, the idea is to have a fun, relaxed evening! The possibilities are endless.
So experiment this week. Write STOP on stickies and place them in your office or on your fridge, as a reminder.
Once you have the idea, the technique takes about a minute to complete.The more you practice this technique, the more you start making choices from a place of calm instead of chaos. And that‘s where the magic begins.
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